Winning Words 2/6/13
“I think everybody should get rich and famous and do everything they ever dreamed of, so they can see that it’s not the answer.”  (Jim Carrey)  A story last week said that Bill and Melinda Gates are going to give away most of their fortune instead of passing it down to their children.  Even now, their kids don’t get a cell phone until they’re 13.  “It’s embarrassing,” said one.  BTW, did you have restrictions?    ;-)  Jack

 FROM HY YO SILVER: Clever.////JACK:  Kids are kids.  Did your parents ever embarrass you?////HY YO:  Rarely but yes.  My dad wearing knee socks with sandals in shorts. That - I remember!////JACK:  I've read that children often wind up being mirror-images of their parents.  I wonder what you will look like when you're your father's age, walking on the beach?  I can picture it now.

 FROM WALMART REV:  "Couldn't drink, smoke, dance or chew, nor go with girls that do!" ////JACK:  Did anyone ever refer to you as, "Mr. Pure?"////REV:  No...but Legalistic!////JACK:  Restrictions, self-imposed or by others, can tend to lead to "legalism."  But, that's the way the cookie crumbles.

 FROM SHARIN' SHARON:  Couldn't afford many toys. My favorite toy was cutting paper dolls out of the Montgomery Ward catalogue. Our daughter couldn't have that game 20 years ago--what was it called--that first game all the kids were playing--hand-held, like a video game. We thought it was too expensive. So she made one out of a small cardboard box and played the pretend game on that. One of my very favorite memories of her childhood and, even today, she still has a lot of imagination, dreams and ways she keeps happy.////JACK:  My son couldn't have a toy gun when he was a child, so he found a stick that looked like a gun and used that.  "Bang! Bang!"

 FROM MT IN PENNSYLVANIA:  Oh, how true that has proven to be for so many 'superstars'!  Interesting comment on the Gates family. They are trying to keep their children 'grounded' -- perhaps going a couple of ticks  past dead-center.  I once read an article on teaching children to respect money and to develop relationships based on interests and trust, rather than on status. One key point: "Never let your children know how rich you really are."  Somehow I think there's just no way that can work for Bill & Melinda!////JACK:  No two families are the same.  Each set of parents has their own "situations" when it comes to raising a child.  Bill and Melinda are trying to do the best they can, under the circumstances.  In a sense, Jim Carrey understands.////MT:  I agree. I think they are doing many good things (for family, and for the world). I just found it ironic how the 'expert advice' of the writer breaks down when anybody in the world can Google your net worth!////JACK:  Does that mean I can Google yours, and you can Google mine?
////MT:  I don't think so. For that kind of attention, one needs to be at the level where the entertainment and/or business media wants to pry into your private life.

 FROM HAPPY TRAILS IN NOVA SCOTIA:  Yes, I was only permitted to read one book a day.   We didn't get a TV until I was 16; that was in the nature of a restriction, but didn't bother me at the time--Crusader Rabbit was what I missed the most (used to see it at my aunt's house) and I think that was only 5 minutes a day.   Our kids had to sit down with me when the weekly TV guide came out and pick their two hours' TV to watch during the week.   I don't recall feeling very restricted in that sense, but our house was very disciplined and if I had gotten out of line very much, which I don't think happened, I am sure I would have gotten paddled.////JACK:  I remember being paddled for breaking restrictions.  The restrictions, I don't remember.  The paddling, I do.  Our children remember their restrictions (which I have forgotten)

.FROM MRS HAPPY TRAILS:  Compared to my husband, I grew up like a free bird. It was during the 2 nd world war. All the adults had lots of other worries and I was left to what ever I please. There was no worry of having too much stuff,  I felt loved by my family and had a great time and still do.////JACK:  How about having parents who allowed you, as a teenager, to backpack alone from country to country?///MRS HT:  I just did it. My Parents where not happy about it , but I took little jobs like cleaning offices at night and child care to earn some money.

 FROM TRIHARDER:  I'd rather be sad and rich than sad and poor.  There are some problems that money will solve.  Can you imagine being homeless or without heat or food this winter in Michigan?  But, I do believe that there are studies that say that rich people do not perceive that they are happier than the self perceptions of people who do not have money.////JACK:  As Loretta Lynn sang in "Coal Miner's Daughter"...."Well, I was born a coal miner's daughter  In a cabin on a hill in Butcher Holler  We were poor but we had love  That's the one thing that daddy made sure of   He shoveled coal to make a poor man's dollar."   /////TH:  poor and happy.  Hoodathunket?////JACK:  I remember an expression from Depression Days..."We'll just have to make do."

 FROM WISCONSIN:  I commend those who do put restrictions on their kids.  Our daughter works for a  Wealth Management company.  She won’t allow her two children to have facebook accounts because she has a couple ‘crazy’ clients who get mad at her for not giving them as much money as they want from trust funds set up for them.  She doesn’t want these clients to know anything about her or her family and their whereabouts or activities.  It is a different world that we live in now.  Not all of the wealthy are as well balanced as the Gates are.  As kids we had restrictions to be in our yard by dark or with permission at some neighbor’s home after dark.  We had to let our parents know who we were with, where we were going and what time we’d be home.  My parents never had a curfew for us, but we knew that we had to be home ‘on time’. I wish our grandkids would know what it was like to run free and play with lots of neighbor kids without having to have scheduled play times, but they have survived and are good kids anyway.////JACK:      In "other" days parents worried about diseases that would afflict their children.  With the advent of new vaccines, those worries have been replaced by new ones.

 FROM OUTHOUSE JUDY:  Love Jim Carrey.  He has problems in his life but he was raised Catholic and still believes, even though he still sins...(don't we all).  Our restrictions were simple, do your chores before play, don't go into the county ditch (on the side of our acre of land) and be in before the street lights come on.  I commend the Gates!  It's easy to say "Put your money where you mouth is" but they are trying.  I'm glad we have enough.////JACK:  "Enough" means different things to different people.  I have enough!

 FROM LEE 'N MARIE:  Give to the poor????  What would Jesus do?????????????????????????????? ////JACK:  From the New Testament record, we read that he walked the talk.

 FROM PLAIN FOLKS CHESTER:  We all had restrictions and are better people for it. My dad got a lot smarter as I grew older!  My most noteworthy restriction was "curfew... and that lasted through high school. I didn't lose any sleep over it.////JACK:  I can't remember having a curfew.  Our children didn't have one, either.  I guess it depends on the situation.

 FROM CL IN CALIFORNIA:  The 4 children say we had too many.////JACK:  In retrospect, What do you say?  There are some things that I would do differently in parenting.////CL:  Without a doubt there are things we would change.////JACK:  We try to do the best we can.  The best is not always perfect!

FROM PH IN ARIZONA:  warren buffet did the same thing.  gave away billions of $$.  didn't want the $$ to corrupt his kids. buffet still lives in the same simple home in bought in 1956 for something like 14,000 $$.  my wife's nephew, Doug Anderson, is one of two "chief legal counsels" for buffet and knows him very well.  buffet is a truly humble and sincere man.  a lot like Gates too, i suspect.////JACK:  I've met some millionaires in my lifetime, but at the time, I didn't know it.////PH:  that is good,  sounds like they were not too ful of themselves.  humility is great human virtue which i fear we are losing today...   good quote:  people who are too full of themselves often end up with a bad case of indigestion!

 FROM LP IN PLYMOUTH:  Of course. Here's one: I couldn't ride in the car of a teenage driver until I got my license. The rationale was that as a licensed driver myself I'd know if my friends were bad drivers. ////JACK:  That's one I've never heard of before.  BTW, have you ever gotten a "ticket?"

 FROM KF IN MICHIGAN:  Yes - it took a snow day for me to catch up on emails!!  Lots of restrictions in my family growing up - but nothing unusual for that time and place - curfews, expectations of acceptable grades, going to church, respect for parents, and with 6 kids, we didn't have a lot of stuff - what we had we earned, so we never grew up with expectations of being given anything. Worked for 3 of us, the other 3 have always been very needy as adults.......////JACK:  Each person has/her own canoe to paddle.  One of my core beliefs is that God understands each situation.  My sister and I are the same, yet different..