Winning Words 3/1/11
“In good times, in bad times, I’ll be at your side forever more; that’s what friends are for.” (Sager and Bacharach) The Dionne Warwick (et al) version of this “Friends” song is one of my all-time favorites. “Lean On Me,” sung by Michael Bolton, is another good one about the importance of friends. Someone asked, “Who is your very best friend, exclusive of family, and why?” Any answers? ;-) Jack

FROM SH IN MICHIGAN: My best friend, at each moment, is the one who is leading me closer to God. I've found over these years that, in good times and in bad times, God seems to send me His angels, someone I can really feel--who listens, hears, understands, acts, and amazingly sometimes they are complete strangers except for this bond that--for a moment--exists among us. It's Jesus really. FROM JACK: "What a friend we have in Jesus...." You know the rest of the words, don't you?

FROM PRJM IN MICHIGAN: Jesus -- he is the only one I can ALWAYS lean on. FROM JACK: I was surprised when a church member said that his favorite hymn was "Jesus, Priceless Treasure." This hymn was written in the 17th century, but isn't sung much anymore. After reading your comment, I thought of how the hymn's second line seems to relate: "Truest friend to me." #775 in the Lutheran Book of Worship.

FROM ILLINOIS LIZ: I am blessed with a handful of top-notch "friends for life," who would do anything for me. And I for them... FROM JACK: A handful? Does that mean, 5? As long as there is at least one, we are blessed. A friend in need is a friend indeed! MORE FROM LIZ: I should have said "a half dozen." Actually, I just thought of another one... I am a firm believer in the adage, "It takes a friend to have a friend." Is that how it goes? Doesn't sound right, but you know what I mean, right? Plus, having lived in the same town as most
of these friends all our lives, our bonds only get stronger as we weather storms together.

FROM PEPPERMINT MARY: mary and amy have been on my side forever and will be forevermore. i am
thankful for them by the minute! FROM JACK: Your response reminds me of this song you KNOW!

Oh, we ain't got a barrel of money,
Maybe we're ragged and funny
But we'll travel along
Singing a song
Side by side.

Don't know what's comin' tomorrow
Maybe it's trouble and sorrow
But we'll travel the road
Sharing our load
Side by side.

MORE FROM PEPPERMINT: oh, and, we like james taylor's, "you've got a friend".

FROM TAMPA SHIRL: I am finding that all of my friends are younger than I am for the most part. It
definitely keeps me on my toes. FROM JACK: I was with 3 different friends this past week, and someone came up to each and asked, "Is this your father?" In each instance I just thought that I was with a friend.

FROM JE IN MICHIGAN: I’m so fortunate……exclusive of husband and family…especially, my one sister, Jacqueline,…..probably, Julie Ashley. I’ve known her for more than 22 years and she’s always there for me. She’s selfless. She knows my flaws; she knows my struggles and weaknesses and she’s still there for me. And it’s reciprocal……she helps me, I try to help her and be there for her. We share our lives. She shares her niece and mom and I share my family and friends. She crosses a lot of boundaries in my life, work, family and several groups of friends. Some 22 years ago we worked together. Since then, we’ve gone to Paris together and shared some special times. I’m really lucky to know her. She’s made my life so much more stable. Thanks for making me think about this. Who is your very best friend….exclusive of family and why? FROM JACK: I was afraid that someone would turn the tables on me....not that I don't have any close friends, I do. One consistently calls me, "Brother." I take that to mean that we are best friends.

FROM OUTHOUSE JUDY: Gary. We have been in Toronto...he on business and me on vacation. (He's not technically family and we were friends for years before marriage.) But, not counting Gary, I have three best church friends...for over 56 years they have stood by me and each other. And, one of my best friends is a pastor. I have known Jesten for 53 years. We don't see each other often as she lives in Florida but we have kept in constant communication since working with each other in the 60's and 70's. FROM JACK: You forgot to mention your friend, Chic Sale.

FROM MOLINER CF: My very best friend came as baggage from my marriage. He was the husband of our
Matron of Honor (obviously my wife's best friend) and I didn't meet him until six-months later. He was serving in Korea at the time of the wedding. His second stint, by the way. The first being in Europe during WWII where he spent a year before Normandy with the French Underground. (A real Tom Hanks war story) Anyhow, we "clicked" on first meting and built a loving and trusting relationship of mutual respect from there. His sense of humor complimented mine, his work ethic was mirror image, his kindness was unmatchable. It's rare that best friends have spouses who become best friends. We were blessed. He's gone now, and I think about him every day and how privileged I was to call him, and him me, "My very best friend." FROM JACK: Bacharach could write another song about that.

FROM MOLINER JT: My God, because He is always by my side. FROM JACK: "...a friend that sticketh closer than a brother."

FROM BLAZING OAKS: I, too love this song...my Jr. High chorus sang it at graduation for several years and also loved it. My best friend now is a fellow retired teacher Donna. We taught together for many years, are almost the same age (she has one year on me) and enjoy plays, movies, eating out, discussing books and shopping as well as travel, although our trips are shorter now. Nothing takes the place of a close family, however! I thank God every day for my wonderful family!! As I'm sure most of us do, in our old age. :-)

FROM JL IN MICHIGAN: To my dear friend and family. A good code to live by.

I would never trade my amazing friends, my
wonderful life, my loving family for less gray
hair or a flatter belly. As I've aged, I've
become kinder to myself, and less critical of
myself. I've become my own friend. I don't
chide myself for not making my bed, or for buying

that stupid doofus that I didn't need, but looks so avant
garde on my patio. I am entitled to a treat, to be
messy, to be extravagant.

I have seen too many dear friends leave this
world too soon; before they understood the
great freedom that comes with aging.

Whose business is it if I choose to read or
play on the computer until 4 AM and sleep
until noon? I will dance with myself to those
wonderful tunes of the 60 & 70's, and if I, at
the same time, wish to weep over a lost love
..... I will.

I will walk the beach in a swim suit that is
stretched over a less than an Adonis body, and will dive
into the waves with abandon if I choose to,
despite the pitying glances from the jet set.
They, too, will get old.

I know I am sometimes forgetful. But there
again, some of life is just as well forgotten.
And I eventually remember the important
things.

Sure, over the years my heart has been broken.
How can your heart not break when you lose a
loved one, or when a child suffers, or even
when somebody's beloved pet gets hit by a car?
But broken hearts are what give us strength and
understanding and compassion. A heart never
broken is pristine and sterile and will never know the
joy of being imperfect.

I am so blessed to have lived long enough to
have my hair turning gray, and to have my
youthful laughs be forever etched into deep
grooves on my face.
So many have never laughed, and so many have
died before their hair could turn silver.

As you get older, it is easier to be positive.
You care less about what other people think. I
don't question myself anymore. I've even earned
the right to be wrong.

So, to answer your question, I like being old.
It has set me free. I like the person I have
become. I am not going to live forever, but
while I am still here, I will not waste time
lamenting what ‘coulda, woulda, or shoulda’ been, or worrying
about what will be. And I shall eat dessert every single
day (if I feel like it).

MAY OUR FRIENDSHIP NEVER COME APART, ESPECIALLY WHEN IT'S STRAIGHT FROM THE HEART!